Pretending that everything is normal while everything is crashing around you.
Pretending that everything is OK and doing everything you can to maintain all the daily things that you are expected to do. Working, in secret, to avert disaster. Putting your best face and foot forward in the face of diminishing options. Worrying that appearances have been kept up and that little and big things that are no longer there won’t be missed. Hiding your anxious tears. Keeping your voice steady. Keeping your emotions in check in the face of demands that cannot be met.
Preparing for that moment, when your failure can no longer be hidden and that uncertain future is revealed. What to say? I am sorry. I am still trying my best. Yes, my best today is failure.
Why did you remove my earlier post? I was serious when I offered what at least appeared to be a cry for help or at least understanding. tom.benghauser@alumni.princeton.edu
I have no idea what you are talking about, Tom. I’ve not removed a thing.